Caught In The Middle

    What does a writer who doesn't have a book published talk about? Obviously I could talk about my research--but that's been put on hold due to turning my attentions to short stories and the fact that I'm working on a modern day sci-fi. I've refrained from writing in this blog because honestly....I couldn't think of anything to write. There are so many people out there trying to make it in this crazy writing world that I thought--what could I possibly add? I'm not famous, I have nothing to contribute--no awesome story of struggle and then authorship. I'm still unpublished. A fledgling.

     Raise your hand if you're a writer whose trying to make it and all you've found is the following:

1) Soon to be (or wanna be) writers bemoaning the industry and the unfairness of it all.

2) Authors who have already made it and simply write about 'never giving up', before launching into how awesome their life is.

    I'm coming to hate the phrase 'never give up'. Not because it's not true, you shouldn't give up if you're willing to put in the effort, but because  I keep hearing it from so many people who've 'made it'. Of course they can say it  from their comfy chairs and rather happy bank accounts. That's not to say they didn't struggle through years of hard work. But seeing them upon their shinning thrones of  "Published Author" is hard. It's even slightly galling. I want to stamp my foot like a rebelling 16 year old and say 'you don't know how it feels! You don't know what I put up with! The rejection, the agents ignoring me, the advice I follow only to find out it's useless! You have no IDEA!"

     But they do. Most of them struggled  to get where they are, and usually with the same complaints. Someday I know I'll be in the same position. People will tell me I don't know what it's like to struggle and feel rejection. To feel like a voice in a crow of a million people shouting 'Pick me!'. To survive off of ramen (or in my case, tea) from lack of good money.  If I don't write, if I don't say my feelings, or express myself right now in my fledgling state, the future hopeful writers will only see the shiny throne I sit on. They won't see the mud at the hem of my skirt, or that my hands are calloused and my heart bears the scars of many rejections. They won't see the struggle, and will be unwilling to listen to me if I don't write about my experiences now.

     So this is what my Blog will be about. I will not whine, I will not complain--there are too many people who do that online. And complaining means your not taking control of your writing career. I'll be honest, I complain. I whine to my mother all the time (she's a writer) when an agent I send my work to--that I searched for and carefully selected thinking they would for sure like my work--never replies. But I will not complain to you the reader of this blog. At least not to the point that you want to throw your computer out the window and black list my name. I will try my best to write of my experiences; good, bad, otherwise. Anything I find that works I'll share with you. Any websites or bloggers who get it--who are positive and helpful--I'll share with you.

    This is my promise to you. I might not always have words of wisdom, and I might not always have wonderful news to share with you, but if I don't show the struggles and the successes, how on earth will people and fellow writers ever be able to relate to me? I want to be relatable. I want to be able to help fellow writers know they're not alone in their struggle. I want to be friends! I will tell you this though:

    Writing is not for the faint of heart. It's not for the people who think writing one book will skyrocket you into success.

     Writing is for the people who have found they've always been storytellers. Who can't imagine not telling stories or making one up. Its something you do even when you don't mean to. I hope this blog will help you. I hope I'm not alone. I've found recently that I feel more alone than ever in a sea of writers. So if you feel the same way, stick around. Grab a glass of wine (or brandy, or scotch, or a long island) and join me in this journey of madness called writing. 2014 style!

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